Monday, March 7, 2011

4 Tips for Communicating in a Relationship

Good communication is important in a relationship. We hear this advice so often that it can feel like a cliché. However, the most annoying thing about clichés is that they are usually true. A fulfilling relationship requires productive communication on a regular basis. Here are a few tips to keep you and your partner on the same page.

1. Make time to talk.

So many couples drift apart because they don’t make an effort to stay connected. As often as you can, have a real conversation with your partner without any distractions. This means turn off the television, people. Talk about what’s going on with each other and the world around you.

2. Ask for what you want.

Life would be so much easier if our partner could just know what we want without us having to tell them. Until we all learn to read minds, you need to speak up. If you wish the two of you spent less of your time together surrounded by his friends, tell him in a nice way that you crave more alone time with him. If you really like your feet massaged after a long day, tell your partner that you’d love a foot rub now and then. You deserve to have your needs met in a relationship.

3. Listen.

The most important aspect of communication in my opinion is to listen. Everyone just wants to be heard. When your partner is talking to you, understand and think about what they are saying without interrupting or formulating your response. If you sit back and let your loved one talk about what’s on their mind, they will appreciate you and your bond will stay strong.

4. Sync up your preferred methods and frequency of communication.

Some of us don’t feel like talking before our first cup of coffee in the morning, or as soon as we get home from work. You may feel smothered if your partner calls you three times a day, while others like to be in frequent contact when they are away from their loved one. You may not like to have more than a quick conversation using text messaging, or you might prefer texting to talking on the phone. Talk to each other about your preferences, and figure out a good balance that works for both of you.